Ask the Critics: What Should I Do if I Get Food Poisoning?

?Rebecca F. asks: My boyfriend and I think we got food poisoning from a restaurant we ate at a few days ago since we both got sick within half an hour of each other. Are we supposed to tell the restaurant? What do we do?

Dear Rebecca: Getting food poisoning flat-out sucks. Unfortunately, resolving the poisoning does, too.

Food poisoning is a common occurrence, and the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention actually just published new findings reporting that one in six Americans will get sick from known and unknown bacteria, viruses, and microbes each year. That's about 48 million people, resulting in about 128,000 hospitalizations and about 3,000 deaths. Among these bacteria and viruses, norovirus causes about 60 percent of food-poisoning-related illnesses, while salmonella is the leading cause of hospitalizations.

However, the problem with food poisoning is that because microbes spread in so many ways, it's exceedingly difficult to know if your illness was caused by food or something else. Generally speaking, though, the time elapsed between ingestion and symptoms will be 24 to 72 hours. So if you get sick 20 minutes after eating oysters, don't be so sure that the oysters are to blame and immediately ring up the seafood restaurant where you dined.

I contacted the New York City Health Department with your inquiry, and their recommendation for consumers is not to call the restaurant directly, but to call 311, noting how many people in the dining party became ill. The Health Department will then follow up and interview callers about all food consumed, and will then follow up with the restaurants to determine if there is the possibility of a food-borne illness. If it's determined that there is a possibility, they will send an inspector to the restaurant. The Health Department also recommends keeping any suspicious food for possible testing, but, unless you suspect your diarrhea was caused by your takeout dinner, this can be rather difficult.

If you think your food poisoning was caused from something that you purchased, you can call one of two governmental hotlines. For meat, poultry, egg, and milk products, call the USDA Meat and Poultry Hotline at 888-674-6854. For any other food product, call 888-723-3366.

So that's the short end of it. Unfortunately, just because one person who got sick called 311 doesn't mean that everyone else who got sick from the same place called 311, making the likelihood of a restaurant inspection very small. It's probably best, though, if you and your boyfriend call 311 independently of each other. But basically you're shit out of luck. Literally.

Have a restaurant tip or other food-related news? Send it to fork@villagevoice.com.

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Ask the Critics: What Are Your Guilty Pleasures?

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Laura C. asks: What are some restaurants that you're embarrassed to admit that you like? Tell me your guilty pleasures!

Dear Laura: Well, here goes any shred of culinary cool I have.

It is a ridiculously overhyped restaurant and I always feel a little less beautiful when I eat there (not to mention feeling packed like a sardine), but I have a soft spot for Café Habana. What can I say? I love their Mexican corn, the tlacoyos tres maria (corn cakes stuffed with goat cheese and black beans), and the iced café con leche. But lucky for me, they also deliver, which means I can enjoy their food in a much more comfortable setting: my bed!

Another place I'm fairly ashamed to like is Bubble Lounge. But sometimes you just want to sip Champagne on a comfy sofa. Perhaps if it were named something else I'd feel slightly less douchey. Though I'd still feel pretty douchey about liking Flute, so maybe not.

Having lived in Vietnam, I'm a bit of a snob when it comes to good Vietnamese food, but for those times when I crave "MSG-laden Asian-ish" cuisine (particularly after several beers), I head to Saigon Grill. The cha gio are oily yet crisp and the bun xao with shrimp (a ridiculously enormous portion, I might add) always hits the spot--even though it's really closer in taste to pad Thai.

I also have a penchant for Red Mango and always get the plain yogurt topped with shredded coconut. What kind of twenty-something woman would I be if I didn't secretly like frozen yogurt? Don't hate--it's far better than Pinkberry. Really.

Finally, Bubba Gump Shrimp Co. Ok, just kidding, I've never actually been there. But part of me wishes I had.

Have a tip or restaurant-related news? Send it to fork@villagevoice.com.

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Ask the Critics: What's a Good Winter Cocktail?

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Brighid L. asks: Now that it's cold, my go-to gin and tonic just doesn't hit the spot. Any suggestions for a winter drink?

Dear Brighid: Drinking a gin and tonic shares many similarities with wearing white after Labor Day. Unless you live in a particularly hot climate, it simply shouldn't be done.

That said, my absolute favorite drink come wintertime is a hot buttered rum, which is made by combining rum, sugar, boiling water, spices (usually cloves and nutmeg), and, the most important element, butter. Yes, it's basically like eating cookie dough without the flour. The best I've found is at the dimly-lit West Village cocktail lounge Little Branch, where it's served with a metal straw. Note, though, that last call is at three a.m., and sometimes they turn off the hot water machine at around two thirty, so it's best to get your order in before then.

I find mulled wine to be generally overly spiced and astringent (let's say that most places aren't using Chateau Pétrus), but a well-made hot spiked cider is always bound to put me in the holiday spirit. d.b.a. offers a version with a nice kick of either rum or bourbon, depending on your preference.

If you don't want to go the hot route, might I suggest a punch of some sort? Brush up on the beverage with cocktail historian David Wondrich's excellent new book Punch: The Delights (and Dangers) of the Flowing Bowl before heading to the semi-hidden rum bar Cienfuegos for one of their many punch bowls.

As for general suggestions, I'm partial to Old Fashioneds or, better yet, Sazeracs. A good bartender anywhere should know how to make them, and although they're a bit stronger than your gin and tonic standby, the higher alcohol content will mean that you'll be extra warm and toasty. And isn't that what we all want in the winter?

Have a tip or restaurant-related news? Send it to fork@villagevoice.com.

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